Sunday, July 26, 2015

Overwhelmed



Sisterhood of Widows S.O.W.  Psalm 126:5-6  Please share on your Facebook so that others can see my blogs and maybe help them through their grief.

Overwhelmed!!

Have you ever felt this way before?  Everyone at one point in their lives have been overwhelmed.  You might feel overwhelmed by joy, overwhelmed by tasks, overwhelmed by job responsibilities, by home projects, or grieving for a loved one.  I can say that I have experienced each one of these at one point of my life.  Some more than I would like.  It's okay to feel this way, it's human nature. It's just not a state of mind you want to stay in for very long.

The last month or so, I have  been feeling overwhelmed by house projects.  I had concentrated so much on the inside of my house that I forgot that the outside needed up keep.  With all the rain we have been experiencing, I have had some flooding issues with my garage.  I have some issues that need to dealt with that makes me feel overwhelmed and makes me really miss Kirk more.  Thank the Lord that my dad and uncles have equipment and the knowledge to be able to help me but these projects will take time to complete.  So I sit and wait and try to learn more patience. 

There are times that missing Kirk overwhelms me.  I have noticed that these feelings have started to flare up when I hear of other families that are now experiencing the heartache of losing a spouse and children losing a parent.  We know of two families through friends that have recently lost their wives and the children lost a mom.  One family the loss was sudden, another the lady passed away from a brain tumor she didn't know she had until she suddenly got very sick and ended up in a coma.  Personally knowing about these families and knowing the members seems to really take me back to the first couple of days of our journey.  Those days when you run on adrenaline and just try and make sure you breathe; knowing personally the gut wrenching pain and the cries of why.  Sometimes those feelings can overwhelm you and take your breath away.  Knowing other families, other spouses, other children are having to travel the path of grief saddens and breaks my heart.  In this fallen world, we all have to experience grief.

Being overwhelmed is part of being human.  I am so thankful that I have a Savior who can take that feeling from me.  When I start feeling like life is running away with me and I feel like I am drowning in my problems and issues, I cry out to the Lord and ask Him to help me.  I know and trust He will be there right with me and will make sure I get through this time of my journey.  "As for me, I call to God, and the Lord saves me.  Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice.  He rescues me unharmed from the battle waged against me, even though many oppose me." Psalms 55:16-18.  God does hear us when we cry out and He wants all of His children to be comforted.  We all have an enemy and he wants us to feel overwhelmed and to feel hopeless.  "Be alert and of sober mind.  Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.  Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings." 1 Peter 5:8-9. 

We are never promised a stress free, easy life.  And if you are reading this, chances are you have encountered loss and tremendous grief.  Keep your faith, trust God to bring you through this period of your life.  Don't let Satan get the best of you and give in to your feelings of being overwhelmed and helpless.  Help is here, His name is Jesus and He died for all His children.  You just have to believe and confess with your lips and believe in your heart.  You will not feel immediate relief, but there is light in the morning.  You will know that the Savior of this world is in your corner and you can go into any battle armed with His word, grace, and mercy!!!

Lord thank you for loving me, for loving all of your children.  Thank you for always being there for us when we cry out to you.  Lord I know love began over 2000 years ago when you came to earth as a precious baby and 33 years later you took nails and ransomed me.  Your blood has saved us all Lord. Thank you for that most precious unconditional love.  In your Precious Name I pray, Amen!!

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Emily's Birthday



Sisterhood of Widows S.O.W.  Psalm 126:5-6  Please share on your Facebook so that others can see my blogs and maybe help them through their grief.
Fourteen years ago tonight, Kirk and I were on the eve of being first time parents.  I was scheduled for a C-section that next morning so we decided to go out and get one more dinner before we became first time parents.  Since I had to eat by a certain time, we went to a restaurant called Perkins.  I had a big plate of French toast and a big glass of chocolate milk.  It was so good.  We really enjoyed our meal.

The following morning we went to the hospital as an anxious couple wondering what we got ourselves into, and three days later we left with the most beautiful and precious daughter.  We were so happy.  One our way home, Kirk picked up my hand and kissed it and thanked me for our baby girl.  God had truly blessed us with a healthy and pretty girl.  We were on top of the world. 

Kirk and Emily had a very close relationship and she was his world.  Right before she turned nine,, Kirk suddenly passed of an accident in his mechanic's shop.  Three weeks later she turned 10.  Kirk was always there for her birthday and always got a kick being with her.  He always called her his baby girl.  Now I am left to celebrate her day with her and to remember how much Kirk loved her and how excited he was to be her daddy.

God truly blessed the three of us.  We had each other and God blessed us with our love and relationship the three of us shared.  Emily and I will be sharing her 14th birthday together tomorrow.  Even though Kirk isn't with us to celebrate, we know how much he loved us and how special Emily was to him.  I feel Emily is a very lucky girl to have had a dad that loved her with all of his heart for nine years.  A lot of children never get to experience the love of a dad.  So we will celebrate together with Kirk on our hearts and mind, and will thank God in our storm for the blessing of having Kirk with us.  I know our Father is also celebrating Emily as well.  I know He blessed us as a family for giving us each other. 

Lord thank you so much for blessing us with each other and for blessing us with your Son Jesus.  Through Him, we know one day we will be reunited with Kirk and the rest of our loved ones.  Thank you Lord for giving us the blessing of our Emily.  You made our family complete and with You at the center, there is no storm, no weapon, no person that can stand between you and us!!  In your Precious Name we pray, Amen!!

Happy Birthday to the most beautiful daughter!!!!  Your loving and caring spirit for others is astounding and your love for our Lord is incredible.  I love you and am so proud of your accomplishments when sometimes the deck is stacked against you.  Just keep your eyes focused on Jesus and your heart open to Him at all times and you will succeed through our Lord. I love you so very much!!!  Happy Birthday!!!