Saturday, February 13, 2016


Sisterhood of Widows S.O.W.  Psalm 126:5-6  Please share on your Facebook so that others can see my blogs and maybe help them through their grief.


That day is upon us!!  The "love" day!!  For us widows, this day can serve as just another reminder that we are without our husbands.  Memories of past Valentine's Day can swell up and leave us feeling lonelier than what we normally feel on a daily basis.  Some of us will plan our day with family and/or friends to help ease the pain.  The lucky few of us might get to go out with other widows or plan a dinner at one of their homes.  No matter what you do, please do something that will lift your spirits and help bring a smile to your beautiful faces.

One good aspect of this year's Valentine's Day is that it falls on a Sunday.  For a lot of us, this day is our day to worship and give back to our Amazing God.  What better date to have on Valentine's Day than our Heavenly Father, our Great Redeemer!!!  You can go to a place that is full of love and acceptance.  Nothing can help a soul heal more than praising a God of LOVE!! 

I am going to share some Bible verses that deal with love.  God is love and He demonstrated His unconditional and undying love by sending His One and Only Son to die on the cross for us.  Here are a few:

John  3:16 NIV  "For God so LOVED the world that He gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life."

1 John 4:19 NIV  "We LOVE because He first LOVED us."

1 Peter 4:18  NIV  "Above all, LOVE each other deeply, because LOVE covers over a multitude of sins."

1 Corinthians 13:4 NIV  "LOVE is patient, LOVE is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud."

Romans 5:18 NIV " But God demonstrates His own LOVE for us in this:  While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."

John 15:13 NIV  "Greater LOVE has no one than this; to lay down one's life for one's friends"

The Bible is LOVE.  It is God's love letter to us, His children.  If you do not have a routine of reading your Bible everyday and mediate on it's words, I encourage you to start a routine on Valentine's Day.  Love pours out of every page.

Maybe you want to start a tradition to celebrate your love for your husband.  Emily and I started taking a balloon out to Kirk's gravesite every year.  Last year I seen a suggestion of taking conversation heart candies and sprinkling them over the gravesite.  The cool part is that where we live, it snows quite frequently during February.  The candies will melt into the snow and make it colorful.  Emily and I continued that tradition today, even in 18 degree weather.  It's a tradition that we have come to cherish and look forward to every year.  If you haven't started your own, will you think about starting one this year?

As I was getting our candy hearts ready, this heart was the first one that jumped out of the bag.  I turned it over and it said, Miss You.  How weird is that?  And how perfect!!  We miss him very much every day!!

Lord, I pray that you be with everyone that is lonely on this Valentine's Day and ever day.  Lord I pray that You fill them up with Your love and that the sting of loneliness softens and dulls as days go by.  Lord You are the only One that can heal our hearts and help us to move forward.  Thank you Lord for loving us more than we can fathom.  In Your Precious Name I pray..Amen!!

Saturday, February 6, 2016

Praise in the Hallway!!

Sisterhood of Widows S.O.W.  Psalm 126:5-6  Please share on your Facebook so that others can see my blogs and maybe help them through their grief.

Praise in the Hallway!!

A couple of months ago as I was scrolling through my Facebook page, I came across a picture that said,  "Until God opens the next door, praise Him in the hallway."  I sat and envisioned myself standing in this hallway without any one else with me.  I could see myself walking up to each and every door knocking and praying that it would open and I could push my way out of that hallway. 

I thought how lonely this hallway looks with all of those doors and the florescent lights overhead.  Do you see yourself in this hallway?  Maybe you see yourself banging on the doors or slumped in the corner defeated, thinking no one will ever answer your cries. 

At first I thought I was by myself in this hallway.  After Kirk suddenly passed, I couldn't see anyone else or their battles.  I didn't see that I wasn't alone in this hallway.  As time went on and I started opening my eyes, I realized that not only was I not alone, but the hallway is crowded; very crowded. 

In this hallway, I have found men, women, and children from different backgrounds and different struggles.  Each one of us are broken in our own way, each one of us with our own tragedies and our own stories.  Many of us in this hallway are battling grief, disease, cancer, divorce, addictions, and broken homes.  Some of us have multiple battles that descended on us at once.  There is a lot of broken hearts and broken lives in this hallway.

So you are probably asking yourself "How do I praise in the hallway when there is so much heartache?"  "How can I trust that a door will open for me?"  A door will open for you because Jesus is standing next to you and will turn that knob.  He will heal your brokenness and is right there with you in that hallway.  Isaiah 41:10 NIV says, "So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold  you with my righteous right hand." 

Praising God in that hallway also shows the trust you have in Him.  Psalm 25:1 NIV says, "In you, Lord my God, I put my trust."  Psalm 33:21-22 tells us, "In Him our hearts rejoice, for we trust in His holy name.  May your unfailing love be with us, Lord, even as we put our hope in you."  I know it's hard to praise and thank God while you are in the midst of your battle.  I know it's hard to sing praises when you are asking the why's of your situation. Always remember what we are told in Romans 8:31, "What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?"

Who is against you and rejoices in your brokenness?  Satan, he loves to see the doubt and mistrust in God.  He causes your heartache and wants you to doubt and fear.  1 Peter 5:8 warns us, "Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour."  He wants to see you miserable, he wants you to doubt God and turn away from your faith.  He doesn't want you to praise God in that hallway, he wants you to cower in the corner and stay in there.  He doesn't want you to look for an open door, he wants you to keep your head down and think you are not worthy to move forward.  Would our loving and gracious God not want you to move forward and keep you there in that hallway?  Would the same God that gave His one and only Son to die for our sins keep you still and not let you move forward with joy and a happy heart?  Think about that?  Would our God of love, grace, and mercy keep you pinned down in misery and loneliness?  Would he keep you isolated with no hope?  NO WAY!!!  God loves each and every one of His children.  1 John 4:10 NIV "This is love: not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins." God loves you!!  So while you are in that hallway, praise His Holy Name!! 

Lord, I pray that while I am standing in that hallway awaiting Your awesome plan for me, I will always praise You and trust that Your plan for me is far better than any plans I have made for myself.  Lord I trust You will open a door for me and will use me for Your purpose.  I pray that my testimony of Your great love will encourage others to praise You as they are waiting too.  Thank you Lord for standing next to me and never leaving my side.  In Your Precious Name I pray Amen!!

Monday, February 1, 2016

Beauty from Ashes!!

Sisterhood of Widows S.O.W.  Psalm 126:5-6  Please share on your Facebook so that others can see my blogs and maybe help them through their grief.

Beauty from Ashes!!

One of my favorite fall activities is a good bonfire.  I love sitting around a good fire and roasting hot dogs and marshmallows.  Sometimes at our bigger parties Kirk would get out his guitar and would serenade us with all types of music.  Since he has been gone, I haven't had the heart to do a big bonfire party.  I did purchase a small fire bowl and we have had small fires for birthday parties and small gatherings.  I love sitting out and watching the embers fly up toward a beautiful starry sky while bundled up watching the flicker of orange. 

Then comes the morning after; the ash and remnants of the firewood. What was once a beautiful glow of warmth is now a dark gray pile of ash and muck.  Doesn't this sound like the journey that we find ourselves on today?  What was once a warm glow of our lives with our husbands now feels like a heap of ash, gray and scattered.  How do you begin to clean up such a mess?  Where do you begin to sweep up the dust of the life you had?  I began with having faith and trust that Jesus would pick me up out of that nasty heap and clean me up and set me on my path of healing. 

We read in Isaiah 61:1-3,"The spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor.  He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives and release from darkness for the prisoners, to proclaim the year of the Lord's favor and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, and provide for those who grieve in Zion-to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair."  Jesus is right there with us in our mourning and is wanting to bring beauty out of the ashes that we find ourselves. 

One day at church during our music worship, they sang a song that brought tears to my eyes immediately.  I had never heard this song but after I left church I bought it.  The song is called Beautiful Things and it's by Gungor.  If you have not heard this song, I strongly encourage you to read the lyrics and listen to the song.  Here is a sample of the lyrics.

All this pain
I wonder if I'll ever find my way
I wonder if my life could really change at all
All this earth
Could all that is lost ever be found
Could a garden come up from this ground at all

You make beautiful things
You make beautiful things out of the dust

Sisters, He does make beautiful things out of the dust and ash.  He is in the process of making my life and yours into a garden that will glorify Him.  Do you believe this?  Do you trust Him to do this for you?  I sure hope you do!!

This song goes on and says:

All around
Hope is springing up from this old ground
Out of chaos life is being found in You!!

I love this song because it describes so many of our lives!!  Not only for us widows, but for all the broken people we all know.  No matter what situation you find yourself in right here and right now, life can be find in Him!! 

Lord I pray for beautiful gardens to spring out of all our ashes.  The path is long for us Lord and dust covers us but there is a beautiful garden waiting for us that You have personalized for each of us. Lord I pray that we each have the patience and trust to follow that path to our gardens.  Thank You Lord Jesus for those gardens of love.  In Your Precious Name I pray..Amen!!

Friday, January 22, 2016


Sisterhood of Widows S.O.W.  Psalm 126:5-6  Please share on your Facebook so that others can see my blogs and maybe help them through their grief.

Changes? Ughh...

Have you said this to yourself?  Since I have been a widow, I have said this a lot.  I have never been a fan of changes and I have found the older I get the worse I feel.  Widowhood throws you in a world of constant changes.  Everything from daily routines, jobs, friends, school, finances, and sometimes our church/spiritual life.  Oh and one more thing about this, all of these changes happen all at once.  When a loved one leaves us, their loss is felt in every aspect of our lives.  For some of us, this will affect our health and sleep patterns. 

If you lost your beloved over a period of time, then you probably experienced changes several times a day.  You had to "go with the flow" on a day to day basis.  This will still not help with that final big change of the passing of your loved one.  With me, Kirk passed suddenly in an accident.  Our changes were chaotic and unexpected.  Either way, life isn't or will never be the same for any of us.  We must learn to not only roll with the changes, we have to LIVE with them as well. 

However, we can always count on our Heavenly Father because He never changes.  His love for us will remain the same throughout eternity.  James 1:17 NIV says, "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like the shifting shadows."  Whenever you get overwhelmed about all the changes you are experiencing, just take a step back, breathe, and whisper Jesus.  Jesus will never change, He is always right there waiting for you.  "Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever." Hebrews 13:8 NIV

As we go along on this path, we must allow ourselves to believe that not all changes are bad.  Some changes are for our good, and are God willed.  These changes will maybe even give us joy and hope.  My heart song for all of you is to let the changes happen and surrender them to Jesus.  He will see all of us through the good and bad, the pretty and the ugly.  Changes that will bring us sorrow and joy will also flex our trust muscles.  He is there waiting to hear your heart.  Jeremiah 29:11 NIV tells us, "For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  FUTURE!!!  Yes sisters, Jesus promises us hope AND a future!! 

Lord, please help me in accepting every change that comes my way on this path.  I pray that everyone reading this also can handle the many changes this journey takes.  Thank you for the promises of hope, a future, but most importantly You will always be there!!  In Your Precious Name I pray, Amen!!

Saturday, January 16, 2016

First Step

Sisterhood of Widows S.O.W.  Psalm 126:5-6  Please share on your Facebook so that others can see my blogs and maybe help them through their grief.

The first step after a major life change is very difficult.  That first step to start on your path is full of unknowns and fear.  Taking that first step shows strength, courage, determination and trust.  What we must remember is that we are not alone when we do decide to take that step.  We have family and friends that will offer love and support. Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ is right there holding our right hand ready to lead us toward healing and restoration.

What we must do to prepare ourselves is trust that we can do this; we can conquer this storm.  This storm does not own you and it will not define who you are.  Only Jesus can define you; He doesn't make mistakes since he is the only perfect person ever to have lived on this earth.  Trust that He will see you through your storm.  Proverbs 3:5 NIV says, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding."  Remember this storm is not bigger than our God.  Our Lord Jesus conquered more than a storm, He conquered death; he conquered the grave.  "Where, O death, is your victory? Where, O death, is your sting?  The sting of death is sin, and the power of sin is the law. But thanks be to God!  He gives us victory through our Lord Jesus Christ." 1 Corinthians 15:55-57 NIV.

This journey was never meant to be a sprint, it's a marathon.  And with any marathon, we must train so we can perform at a peak level. Train with God's Word because you will find stories of hope and encouragement; truth and trust.  You will find people who went through similar circumstances and came out on the other side intact and ready to face any trial.  We are told to give thanks while we are in the middle of our storms.  1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 NIV tells us, "Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus."   Weird right? To thank Jesus for the current trial you are enduring?  I thought so too and then I learned that thanking Him always you are showing trust.  Whatever your circumstances, just trust and thank Jesus.  Jesus knows your outcome already, He knows that your trial today will be used for His glory tomorrow.  Our story of our journey will one day be someone else's blessing. 

My prayer for all of you is that you trust that your outcome will be glorious.  This storm will not define you, but it will make you a person that learns to trust Jesus.  The testimony of your path will glorify God and will draw those far from God back into His glorious Kingdom.  I pray that you take that first step of healing and lean on Jesus.  He is always right there by your side ready to lead you.  All you need to do is trust, surrender, and walk!!!


Thursday, January 7, 2016

I am holding onto You!!

Sisterhood of Widows S.O.W.  Psalm 126:5-6  Please share on your Facebook so that others can see my blogs and maybe help them through their grief.

Praise be to the Lord, for he has heard my cry for mercy.  The Lord is my strength and shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me.  My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.  Psalm 28:6-7 NIV

The holidays are over and the soft glow of Christmas lights have turned to darkness.  This can also describe how must of us feel after we go back to our routine lives after a long deserved Christmas break.  January has always been a tough month for me; even before my husband Kirk suddenly passed.  But now four and a half years out, winter seems even longer and darker. 

But even in our darkest winter night, we are all promised a bright light that shines for all the world.  Jesus is that light and He came to shine in each of our hearts all year.  Jesus tells us in John 8:12 NIV, "When Jesus spoke again to the people he said, 'I am the light of the world.  Whoever follows me will never walk in the darkness, but will have the light of life."  So when we are at a low point and the long winter nights get you down, just remember Jesus is the light.  Grab your Bible and read the Psalms, they are full of hope, love, and encouragement.  Psalm 119:105 NIV says, "Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path."  Jesus is not only our Light for our lives, His Word will guide us toward Him.

Storms will come and go in our lives; none of us are immune.  Our Lord and Savior will always be with us in the storm that threatens to engulf us.  Remember that Jesus is your shield against the howling winds of your storm.  Psalm 28:6-7 NIV states, "Praise be to the Lord, for he has heard my cry for mercy.  The Lord is my strength and shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me.  My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him."  I know it's hard to trust Him in the middle of your struggles and cries, but keep trusting Him.  I promise you He will hold you up and sit your feet on solid ground.  It will take time, patience, tears and joy but it will happen!! 

Lord I pray for everyone that is holding on to you as tight as they can.  Lord please show them love, compassion and mercy as they trust You to deliver them out of their storm.  You are our Redeemer and Counselor that will never betray or forsake us.  We are holding on to You!!  In Your precious name I pray.  Amen

Thursday, December 31, 2015

Happy 2016!!

Sisterhood of Widows S.O.W.  Psalm 126:5-6  Please share on your Facebook so that others can see my blogs and maybe help them through their grief.

2016 is just hours away!!

How are you spending tonight?  With your family?  With new/old friends?  With a new love?  With your puppy dogs or kitties?   There are all kinds of ways to spend this night, but please do not spend it alone. 

A new year can bring a flood of emotions and thoughts; a sea of regrets or a new hope of a better future.  Do you make resolutions?  I do sometimes but not a big fan of them.  I did have one that I did finally get to do.  It was fun and worth the wait since I had made it a couple of years ago. 

If you do resolutions there is one that I hope you decide to make and keep this year.  That one special resolution and hope I have for you is to spend more time in God's word.  You will find love, faith, trust, and hope for a better future and for your eternity.  I know all too well the feeling of being heartbroken and feeling despair after losing Kirk.  But I made a promise to myself that I would keep reading God's word and keep trusting Him.  I kept myself tethered to His love and promises.  Hebrews 6:17-20 NIV says, "Because God wanted to make sure the unchanging nature of his purpose was very clear to the heirs of what was promised, he confirmed with an oath.  God did this so that, by two unchangeable things in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled to take hold of the hope set before us may be greatly encouraged.  We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where our forerunner, Jesus, has entered on our behalf.  He has become a high priest forever, in the order of Melchizedek. 

You may feel overwhelmed by a flood of emotions and feel as though you are drowning.  Please do not lose hope and trust.  Just know that our Lord Jesus Christ is there for you holding out His hand to you.  Remember that He is our Savior that has walked on water. He will reach down and pull you out of that lake of despair.  Peter and the disciples witnessed first hand Jesus walking toward them on a lake that was swirling around Him.  Matthew 14:29-31 NIV we read, "When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. 'It's a ghost,' they said, and cried out in fear.  But Jesus immediately said to them: 'Take courage! It is I. Don't be afraid.'  'Lord if it's you,' Peter replied, 'tell me to come to you on the water.'  'Come,' he said.  Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on water and came toward Jesus.  But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and beginning to sink, cried out, 'Lord, save me!'  Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. 'You of little faith,' he said, 'why did you doubt."   The point I'm trying to make is that even Peter lost faith and Jesus was right there in front of him.  It's human to lose hope and faith, but just don't stay there.  Reach your hand out and call on Jesus.  He will be there every single time; waiting to pull you out of that lake of despair and hopelessness!! 

I pray that this year you will find courage and strength through Jesus to start a fresh new year.  If you haven't put your faith in Jesus, He is waiting to renew your heart and spirit.  He will extend grace and love to you!!  I want to wish every single one of you a very Happy New Year and I pray that this year you will stand tall and keep your eyes on Jesus.  I pray you keep looking up and start living the life Jesus wants you to live.  Share love, laughs, tears, and compassion with everyone you love and ones that need you!!!!

Lord I pray that this year we will become more like you every day.  I pray that we all keep our minds filled with You.  You are love and we all need more of You every single day.  In Your Precious Name I pray, Amen!!

Happy 2016!!!